I'm Melting...I'm Melting!!!

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Mesh

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Feb 19, 2005
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Liverpool Laaaaa
What's the worst thing that can happen when you're off your twizzle sticks/stoned/monged in a mash up?

I'll start...
The light coming through the curtains...I'm melting:eek:
Someone fresh turning up:naughty:
Losing the remote control and you proper can't work out how to turn the telly over:cry:
Running out of booze:cry:
Running out of bifters:cry:
Some random family member(of the sensible nature) knocking for Sunday visits:naughty:

anymore fer anymore:D
 

Jonno

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Jul 15, 2001
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What's the worst thing that can happen when you're off your twizzle sticks/stoned/monged in a mash up?

I'll start...
The light coming through the curtains...I'm melting:eek:
Someone fresh turning up:naughty:
Losing the remote control and you proper can't work out how to turn the telly over:cry:
Running out of booze:cry:
Running out of bifters:cry:
Some random family member(of the sensible nature) knocking for Sunday visits:naughty:

anymore fer anymore:D

Its Amelie...

I am with you on the someone fresh thang, it can really fuck up the vibe- unless of course its a great friend then its ace-more so if you have all been to diff places and are meeting up at a usual base.

I will add the few mins that one tape ends and another is being found/put on. Fucking hell the silence is like torture:fekked:

Running out of drugs when you want it to go on and on and on.
 
Lol at the above - so true :D Some more:

A housemate you got separated from in the club bringing home a really annoying member of the opposite sex so they can shag them later. Said person will-not-shut-up cos they've done loads of Columbia's Finest, and they do everyone else's as well (they have none of their own) before heading off to have noisy sex with your housemate.

same housemate bringing home people he has befriended in the club who look like they are on bail for aggravated burglary. These people bring music that they insist on playing, this music will be Happy Hardcore or 'warp-warp' Speed Garage.

The five a.m phonecalls to various dealers you'd normally avoid like the plague, and either the let-down or the terrifyingly meandering drive with your moffit friends to go and score from the dodgy council estate it's bound to be in. Every car on this journey will be a milk float, a taxi or a Police car. In your head they're all Police cars, even the milk floats :crazy:

Trying to make a brew for 9 people when rendered incapable of operating a kettle or remembering what everyone wanted...it was never gonna work. Just go and sit down :$

Coming home to a stoned insomniac housemate playing Resident Evil, he doesn't stop when you come in. Everyone gets the fear :fekked:

Loads more but that'll do for now!
 

Mesh

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Feb 19, 2005
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Liverpool Laaaaa
Lol at the above - so true :D Some more:

A housemate you got separated from in the club bringing home a really annoying member of the opposite sex so they can shag them later. Said person will-not-shut-up cos they've done loads of Columbia's Finest, and they do everyone else's as well (they have none of their own) before heading off to have noisy sex with your housemate.

same housemate bringing home people he has befriended in the club who look like they are on bail for aggravated burglary. These people bring music that they insist on playing, this music will be Happy Hardcore or 'warp-warp' Speed Garage.

The five a.m phonecalls to various dealers you'd normally avoid like the plague, and either the let-down or the terrifyingly meandering drive with your moffit friends to go and score from the dodgy council estate it's bound to be in. Every car on this journey will be a milk float, a taxi or a Police car. In your head they're all Police cars, even the milk floats :crazy:

Trying to make a brew for 9 people when rendered incapable of operating a kettle or remembering what everyone wanted...it was never gonna work. Just go and sit down :$

Coming home to a stoned insomniac housemate playing Resident Evil, he doesn't stop when you come in. Everyone gets the fear :fekked:

Loads more but that'll do for now!

hahahahaha!!! Fuckin quality!!
Going to the offey whilst dressed as a cat with issues(or any other form of 'this would be a boss thing to dress up as' charactor) is also a bad move when you go out in public to buy booze/supplies:naughty:
 
hahahahaha!!! Fuckin quality!!
Going to the offey whilst dressed as a cat with issues(or any other form of 'this would be a boss thing to dress up as' charactor) is also a bad move when you go out in public to buy booze/supplies:naughty:

Niice! Deciding to go for a pint in the local pub despite having eyes like fucking saucers and still wearing the clothes you went clubbing in. The pub either does not open for another hour, or is full of the kind of blokes you'd normally cross the street to avoid. Who are staring at you and your mates in their clubbing gear. It's a proper 'Withnail and I' moment :|

A bloke once came to our after club mashup bringing his two Old English Sheepdogs with him (the mahoosive Dulux Dogs) as he didn't want to leave them on their own. Everyone got wrecked, and after a while drifted home. Ahh, bliss! Empty house, time for bed, one more brew to take to bed with me. I look out the kitchen window to see these bloody huge dogs bounding towards me - the owner had forgotten them! We fed them and looked after them for another day until he came back to collect them. Random...
 

Mesh

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Feb 19, 2005
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Liverpool Laaaaa
Niice! Deciding to go for a pint in the local pub despite having eyes like fucking saucers and still wearing the clothes you went clubbing in. The pub either does not open for another hour, or is full of the kind of blokes you'd normally cross the street to avoid. Who are staring at you and your mates in their clubbing gear. It's a proper 'Withnail and I' moment :|

A bloke once came to our after club mashup bringing his two Old English Sheepdogs with him (the mahoosive Dulux Dogs) as he didn't want to leave them on their own. Everyone got wrecked, and after a while drifted home. Ahh, bliss! Empty house, time for bed, one more brew to take to bed with me. I look out the kitchen window to see these bloody huge dogs bounding towards me - the owner had forgotten them! We fed them and looked after them for another day until he came back to collect them. Random...

You my friend have had me laughing my fucking arse off...nice work my friend:thumbsup: :thumbsup:

PS Sheepdogs at a mash up are deffo a fuckin no go....oh fuckin dear!!!!


Just thought of another headwreck...The **** who wants to tell you all about their ma/da/grandads bowel cancer:naughty: Sad..I'm sure..but not appropriate for fucked up convos please:cry:
 

blue jammer

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Dec 9, 2003
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Trips to the shop :fekked: When you are at the shop thinking you know exactly what it is you are there for when all around you the place is shape-shifting and people are melting into the shelves amongst the beans :fekked:

Saying to yourself what you want to get so you will remember when you 'find it' - only not to find whatever it was that you thought you wanted :fekked: Being worried that everyone else in front of you is buying flowers (Fuck, is it mothers day or sommat - have I forgot?) spiralling moments of paranoia and the thought vanishing as to what the original idea you were there for...

Chicken and Beer, you keep repeating those as you've just remembered what it is you needed (in an Elvis accent!) then when they are secured in the wire gathering machine (basket to normal people) working out what money is, and what you need to do when faced with the till monsters who don't seem to speak the same language and seem to want you to leave (heavy heavy moments like Neil in the young ones)

Getting home from the journey which has taken about 4 days by now and then waking up later to find you've not bought any chicken, no beer, just a load of feather dusters :fekked: :$

:cops: :cops: :cops:

Beer and chicken, chicken and beer...
 

Mesh

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Feb 19, 2005
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Liverpool Laaaaa
Trips to the shop :fekked: When you are at the shop thinking you know exactly what it is you are there for when all around you the place is shape-shifting and people are melting into the shelves amongst the beans :fekked:

Saying to yourself what you want to get so you will remember when you 'find it' - only not to find whatever it was that you thought you wanted :fekked: Being worried that everyone else in front of you is buying flowers (Fuck, is it mothers day or sommat - have I forgot?) spiralling moments of paranoia and the thought vanishing as to what the original idea you were there for...

Chicken and Beer, you keep repeating those as you've just remembered what it is you needed (in an Elvis accent!) then when they are secured in the wire gathering machine (basket to normal people) working out what money is, and what you need to do when faced with the till monsters who don't seem to speak the same language and seem to want you to leave (heavy heavy moments like Neil in the young ones)

Getting home from the journey which has taken about 4 days by now and then waking up later to find you've not bought any chicken, no beer, just a load of feather dusters :fekked: :$

:cops: :cops: :cops:

Beer and chicken, chicken and beer...

5 stars my friend.....5 fuckin stars:thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup:
 
Trips to the shop :fekked: When you are at the shop thinking you know exactly what it is you are there for when all around you the place is shape-shifting and people are melting into the shelves amongst the beans :fekked:

Saying to yourself what you want to get so you will remember when you 'find it' - only not to find whatever it was that you thought you wanted :fekked: Being worried that everyone else in front of you is buying flowers (Fuck, is it mothers day or sommat - have I forgot?) spiralling moments of paranoia and the thought vanishing as to what the original idea you were there for...

Chicken and Beer, you keep repeating those as you've just remembered what it is you needed (in an Elvis accent!) then when they are secured in the wire gathering machine (basket to normal people) working out what money is, and what you need to do when faced with the till monsters who don't seem to speak the same language and seem to want you to leave (heavy heavy moments like Neil in the young ones)

Getting home from the journey which has taken about 4 days by now and then waking up later to find you've not bought any chicken, no beer, just a load of feather dusters :fekked: :$

:cops: :cops: :cops:

Beer and chicken, chicken and beer...

That is fucking genius! :rofl: :rofl:
 

lottie

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Apr 24, 2006
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where ever i lay my hat ( straw one )
Playing in a ballpool in a straight as fuck in pub / eatery on a sunday still in sat nite clothes , and trying to fathom out were the steps are for the slide you must have a go on only to be told off by coco the clown complete with red nose n silly shoes :D
 

PepeLePew

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Hyde
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The train of shame (home):naughty:

Sweat. Please stop sweating.

Cold and rain :|

The closed eyes tripping, waiting for sleep to commence...

Wee. Seriously I wish it would make its frigging mind up. Wee every 20-30 mins after the club but can't wee at all in the club. :mad:

Being talked in to going to your most sacred curry house the day after no sleep. Nodding to the music in your head, realising your nodding to the dudes that serve you and trying to pass off that you're still pissed :S
 

U31

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Dec 18, 2007
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Kiss me brown eye
Lol, that was almost me n jiglo without the cowshit, after a weekend at Bernies (n Bods)
Near bods is a motorway services you can walk to, Two coppers walk in for thier breccy, i swear you could read thier minds! They were scanning the car park to work out if we had driven there! :mad:
 

BOD

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Sep 4, 2007
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over there
Lol, that was almost me n jiglo without the cowshit, after a weekend at Bernies (n Bods)
Near bods is a motorway services you can walk to, Two coppers walk in for thier breccy, i swear you could read thier minds! They were scanning the car park to work out if we had driven there! :mad:

this is what that trip to the corner shop felt like Dave last weekend, that poor bastard behind the counter was frightened to death of me lol

YouTube - Fear and Loathing In Las Vegas Ether

:fekked: :fekked: :fekked: :fekked: :fekked: :fekked: :fekked: :fekked:
 

chinatownswhite

Well-known member
Feb 2, 2008
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Middlander
walking the dog you have to do it
take the dog for a walk and getting collared by a complete stranger who wants to talk dogs, and then they invite themselves into to your walk and tag along and continue to ask you questions that you know but really you struggle to answer them, and the whole time you keep saying to yourself they know they know I'm off my nut :fekked:. and cant wait to get home to your safty room and worry about the next time you bump into them .

bumping into someone you know
always happens, you have sneaked out to get some much wanted supplies that has taken you a 4hr build up to get out there and get them and then it happens you bump into someone you know who is a straight head and they ask you if you are OK and you follow the question with a string of bullshit like "oh i wasn't well last night really didn't sleep well and I'm really knackered etc" and again your saying to your self they know they know.

trying to sleep with that tune still in your head
This always happens to me, every one's gone you feel real tired and think your gonna sleep until you start humming that tune in your head over and over and over again, you try to stop it but it starts again and becomes a vicious circle:crazy: and for some reason putting your head under the pillow does not work.

Sunday lunch mums
The night b4 you tell ya self your gonna be good, it don't happen cus you have no self control, cus your mad for it,but you try real hard and try to convince yourself i will just have a bit and no more after a certain time, b4 you know it it 5 in the morning:crazy: :fekked: :crazy: and dare not look in the mirror and now you start thinking of bullshit excuses not to go for lunch but because you have no self control you have used them all b4 and put off the Sunday lunch so many times you have no choice but to go .

You get there and your mum is going on at you and keeps asking if you are OK,
which kicks the para in and the heart's racing, and then the same old bullshit starts, you start saying you wernt to well last night, and even lie so much you say you didn't even go out lol as you felt so rough and your guts are propa off etc lol.

Then the food comes to the table "fuck me that's one dry looking Yorkie pud" after an hr of shoving your food round the plate and hiding bits under each other to make it look like you even tried to eat it, your mum say leave it if your poorly:D :fekked: you say your goodbyes and get the hell out of there at 100mph .

dog shit
You have been out gotten into your usual mess:crazy: and invite loads of friends back:jumpin: , you open the door to find the dog as shit, now he has not just done one dump, because you have been out and had some fun he has decided to do the through the house and do one of his special styleeeee continual shittttts which goes from room to room:naughty:, and you have to pile your mates into a safe zone, holding there noses while you deal with the deed and leaves you on your hands and knees for at least 3/4 of hr doing some real scrubbing and retching and convince yourself the smell is going, beleive me you know who your real mates are if this happens because they stay .
 

Northern Star

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May 10, 2004
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On Cloud 9!!!
Dressing your male friends up in your own clothes cus you think its a laugh :p (yes Damo) ;)

Putting on music then realising its not what you want on, and keep doing this for the next hour or so to realise your fed up of music and want a film on then change your mind cus u cant settle to the film and decide you want to go exploring in the woods or hugging warm pipes lol!

Almost causing a crash on the main road cus you decide to go the shop with your m8 one wearing a halo and the other one of these on their head..

head_massage.gif