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Thread: Real application for Mcdonalds lol

  1. #1

    Join Date
    Dec 2003
    Location
    Old skool Heaven
    Posts
    277

    Real application for Mcdonalds lol

    This is an actual job application that a 17-year-old boy submitted at a
    McDonald's restaurant in Florida; and they hired him because he was so
    honest and funny!

    NAME: Greg Bulmash.

    SEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person.

    DESIRED POSITION: Company's President or Vice President. But seriously,
    whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be
    applying here in the first place.

    DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz
    style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can
    haggle.

    EDUCATION: Yes.

    LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.

    SALARY: Less than I'm worth.

    MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and
    'post-it' notes.

    REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.

    AVAILABLE FOR WORK: Of course. That's why I'm applying.

    PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30 - 3:30pm., Monday, Tuesday and Thursday.

    DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they're better suited to a more
    intimate environment.

    MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?

    DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING
    UPTO 50lbs?: 50lbs. of what?

    DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the appropriate question here would be "Do you
    have a car that runs?"

    HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may already be the
    winner of the Publishers Clearinghouse Sweepstakes.

    DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job, no, on my breaks, yes.

    WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas with
    a fabulously wealthy dumb blond supermodel who thinks I'm the greatest thing
    since sliced bread. Actually, I'd like to be doing that now.

    DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR
    KNOWLEDGE?: Yes. Absolutely.

    SIGN HERE: Aries.

  2. #2

    Join Date
    Oct 2004
    Location
    im like herpes....never quite fcuk hoff!!!
    Posts
    5,282
    absolute class



  3. #3

    Join Date
    Mar 2004
    Posts
    2,259

  4. #4

    Join Date
    Jun 2003
    Location
    Manchester....THE WRONG SIDE OF THE PENNINES
    Posts
    3,284
    I think he'll make a good burger flipper....if that fails he can always put the lettuce on the big macs

    "Osama bin Djing"

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