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Thread: Unimogs, land rovers and gay porn

  1. #1

    Join Date
    Dec 2007
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    Kiss me brown eye
    Posts
    2,534

    Unimogs, land rovers and gay porn

    A long long time ago, i owned this big fooker...


    Unimog 404 Doka, straight 6 petrol 2.2 litre mercedes.

    One day while driving it from Radcliffe to Bolton, it broke down, proper style after dirt in the fuel line blocked the idle jets of the carb, so i rang Paul, a mate to tow me home with this landy..


    The pic where that is taken is Smithill's in Bolton, and looking behind the cars lies Darwen, where my mates farm is, behind the A666
    The mog was kept in the end barn when not being used.

    Sooo Paul rocks up, we attach a straight bar tow pole (the mog is a HGV ) and of we trot through Bolton up to the moors....

    We get up to about 25mph so i decide to dump the clutch in 3rd high in the mog and see if it will run. It started, but rough as a badgers, and every time i revved it backfired like a machine gun.
    So its five mile of popping and banging, and peoples heads twitching behind curtains at the racket, and me crying my eyes out wi laughter!

    By the time we got to the farm, it was getting dark, so i dumped the 'mog in the barn, thanked Paul and bid him good night.

    Now he had to get home from Smithills to Darwen.
    The fastest way is along Scout rd, Up Belmont rd, then down past the bleachworks towards the A666.

    Little known to us, at night this becomes a gay hangout!

    So Paul is innocently driving along and sees two blokes pushing a broken down fiesta...

    So being a gent he rolls down the window and is about to shout out if they needed any help, but the only sound to escape his mouth is a sound like Beeker makes... "MEEP!!!!"

    In Pauls own words, "They wernt pushing the car, and i know the one in front had red hair and i never saw his face... and to top it all there was a third guy behind the two importuners filming the entire thing!"

    So there ya go, if you see a gay porn flick where a white land rover rocks up, the driver shouts "Meep!!" and fucks off sharpish, that's my claim to fame!



  2. #2

    Join Date
    Jul 2001
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    Everywhere & nowhere baby, that's where I'm at...
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    So THAT'S where I know you from....

  3. #3

    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    Kiss me brown eye
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    2,534
    Fpmsl!!!

    You was that man, was the Fiesta ok?

  4. #4

    Join Date
    Oct 2005
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    Hyde
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    2,194
    Did you clear the block fuel line with compressed air.
    And did you do any det damage to the pistons

  5. #5

    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    Kiss me brown eye
    Posts
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    No, you can buy a unimog carb rebuild kit, it comes with all jets included, so it got one of those, and i seem to recall rebuilding the dizzy, it was all shielded lines cables and ht leads to stop radio interference --- it was ex army.. No damage, it was a low compression engine, as it was designed to run on shit fuel in theatres such as Africa

    The sound of that engine bellowing on full chat is quite something!

    When Slave Tony next comes out, Kev, ask him about the time i dropped the front passenger wheel down a dissused mineshaft, and nearly smashed his kneecaps as the mog came from 20mph to zilch in zero seconds!
    The mog was on its side and i thought id have to walk back and drag it out with the john deere... i got out and saw it was resting on the passenger front arch, so i got back in, selected diff locked crawler forward first gear (2 boxes split of the mainbox, crawler first & second, with a lever to reverse these gears, then tapthe stick sideways to the right for the 4 road gears, no reverse in these four though)
    The thing walked out as if it wasnt there!
    See that tiny dent on the middle of the arch in the pic? That was the only damage!

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