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Thread: crap joke corner

  1. #1

    Join Date
    Feb 2003
    Location
    sunshine on Leith, via Watford
    Posts
    2,667

    crap joke corner

    Whats an illegal immigrant got in common with sperm?

    Millions come flooding in but only one bastard works *ahem*

    turps gets his coat

  2. #2

    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Posts
    134
    Like it Turps, political an up to date anall Mines not

    What's the difference between a pick pocket and a pervert......

    One snatches watches..... YOU WORK IT OUT !!!!!!

  3. #3

    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    On Cloud 9!!!
    Posts
    18,200

  4. #4

    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Location
    Batley/Leeds
    Posts
    46
    why does barbie never get pregnant?
















    Because Ken comes in another box


  5. #5

    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Posts
    134
    [QUOTE=Haylz]why does barbie never get pregnant?

    Oh my goodness this really is crap joke corner isn't it
    Two snowmen stood in a field and one says to the other "can you smell carrots" (I think I stole this from Soza before I get in trouble

    OOOH STOOOP IT!!!!

  6. #6

    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    Eccles
    Posts
    1,025
    HAHA i must be sad coz i found them all funny lol

  7. #7

    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Location
    manchester
    Posts
    56
    me 2, lol

  8. #8

    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    fancying pigeons....
    Posts
    1,621

    My turn ......

    A little boy asks his "mummy why am i black and your white?"
    Mum replies "ffs when i think back to that party its a wonder ya dont bark !!"

  9. #9

    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Sutton
    Posts
    205
    Two packets of crisps are going down the road when a car pulls over and asks if they'd like a lift to which they reply...........



    No thanks we're Walkers

  10. #10

    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Posts
    134
    Ah! come on folks I was expecting alot more hits to this thread.

    What's red and sits in a tree.... A sanitary owl

  11. #11

    Join Date
    Jul 2001
    Posts
    1,160
    a pirate walks into a bar with the wheel of a ship sticking out of the fly of his pants.
    the bartender says, 'hey, you know you have a wheel of a ship sticking out of your pants?'
    the pirate says 'aye, it's drivin' me nuts'

  12. #12

    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Posts
    134
    Two blondes walk on to a bar. You'd think one of them would have seen it.
    IFYOU DON'T LIKE ME THAT'S YOUR PROBLEM

  13. #13

    Join Date
    Oct 2001
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    1,020

    Happy Easter

    Happy Easter
    Attached Images Attached Images crap joke corner-asshurts-jpg 

  14. #14

    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Posts
    134
    Quote Originally Posted by spiely
    Happy Easter
    That is wicked almost pmsl then. GET IN!!!
    IFYOU DON'T LIKE ME THAT'S YOUR PROBLEM

  15. #15

    Join Date
    Jul 2001
    Posts
    1,160
    a guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. he orders a drink and while heís drinking, the monkey starts jumping all over the place. the monkey grabs some olives off the bar and eats them, then grabs some sliced limes and eats them, then jumps up on the pool table, grabs the cue ball, sticks it in his mouth and swallows it whole.

    the bartender screams at the guy, 'did you see what your monkey just did?' the guy says, 'no, what?' 'he just ate the cue ball off my pool table - whole!' says the bartender. 'yeah, that doesnít surprise me,' replies the patron. 'he eats everything in sight, the little twerp. iíll pay for the cue ball and stuff.' he finishes his drink, pays his bill, and leaves. two weeks later heís in the bar again, and he has his monkey with him. he orders a drink and the monkey starts running around the bar again.

    while the man is drinking, the monkey finds a maraschino cherry on the bar. he grabs it, sticks it up his butt, pulls it out, and eats it. the bartender is disgusted. 'did you see what your monkey did now?' 'now what?' asks the patron. 'well, he stuck a maraschino cherry up his butt, then pulled it out and ate it!' says the barkeeper.

    'yeah, that doesnít surprise me,' replies the patron. 'he still eats everything in sight, but ever since he ate that damn cue ball he measures everything first!'

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