The Elland Road Rhapsody!

[Ginger Legacy]

Is this the real life-
Is this just fantasy-
Leeds in a landslide-
No escape from reality-
Batter your wife,
shag sheep and cry and weeeeep
you're just a poor club, you've got no sympathy
Because you're easy come, easy go,
flying high, now you're low
Leeds are going under, doesn't really matter to me,
To me

Ridsdale, you've killed the club,
Put a goldfish on your desk,
spent too much, but now he's dead,
Ridsdale, life had just begun,
But now you've gone and thrown it all away-
Leeds Scum, ooooooh,
makes me laugh to see you cry
If your team has gone bust this time tomorrow-
Carry on, carry on, cos nothing really matters-

Too late, their time has come,
Sends shivers down my spine-
can't stop laughing all the time,
Goodbye Leeds United-you've got to go-
Gotta leave the premier league and face the truth-
Leeds Scum ooo
I want to see you cry,
I bet that little lad on tv wishes he'd never been born at all-

I see a little shadow of a team,
YSBYSBYSBYSBYSBYSB Songs, YSBYSBYSBYSBYSBYSB Songs, but your club are going under-
Smithy to United-very very frightening me-
Peter Ridsdale, Peter Ridsadale
Peter Ridsdale, Peter Ridsadale
Peter Ridsdale, magnifico-oh oh oh oh oh

you're just a poor club and nobody loves you-
your grandad is your father, keep it in the family
spending your cash on some monstrosity-
Easy come easy go, will you let me go-
Seth Johnson! no-,we will not let you go-let him go-
Seth Johnson! we will not let you go-let him go
Seth Johnson! we will not let you go-let me go
Will not let you go-let me go
Will not let you go let me go
No,no,no,no,no,no,no-
Thanks for Eric, Thanks For Eric, Thanks for Eric, He's a god-
Ferdinand a red devil for £30 mil, £30 mil, £30 Mil

So you think its funny to sing songs when people die-
So you think we'll all miss you because you cried-
Oh leeds scum-you make me @#%$ my sides leeds scum-
Just going down-just going right outta here-

Leeds are going under
Anyone can see,
Leeds are going under, and I think it's really Funneeee

[ZENZEN]

Quality mate!! PMSL!!!

Today is Lucas Radebe's 26th birthday and he will be having a meal with his team-mates tonight. However, they will have to eat with their hands as they have no silverware



Q: What's the difference between Nigel Martyn and a taxi driver?
A: A taxi driver only lets in four at a time.



Q: What's the difference between a Pyromaniac and Leeds football club?
A: A Pyromaniac wouldn't throw away all his matches!



Q: How can you tell when Leeds are losing?
A: It's five past three.



There was this group of people on a tour-bus. The guide on the bus asked if anyone on the bus could tell the rest a joke, whereupon a man got up and said that he could tell a Leeds joke.
Suddenly a bloke in the back of the bus said, "No, don`t do that. I`m a Leeds fan."
The guide looked at him and said, "That`s okay. We`ll explain it to you afterwards."




Martyn is so distraught after his latest blunder that he decides to end it all. He walks straight out of Elland Road and throws himself down in front of a number 9 bus. Luckily, it passes under him.




Q: What do you call a Leeds fan with lots of girlfriends?
A: A Shepherd





What do you call a Leeds fan in a 3 bedroom semi?
A burglar



Why do people take an instant dislike to anyone from Leeds?

It saves time



Did you hear about the Conservative MP who was found dead in a Leeds U strip?

The police had to dress him up in women's underwear in order to save his family from the embarassment.


What do you say to a United fan with a job?

"Can I have a Big Mac!"



Q) What has 70,000 arms and an IQ of 170
A) Elland road on every other Saturday



A nurse at Leeds General Infirmary told an industrial tribunalhow she tried to stop the fight between two top doctors which resulted in one of them being sacked by the hospital."I pulled them apart" said sexy Jane Adams, 21, "and could see Dr Jones was in tears. I asked him what it was about and he sobbed 'It's that man on D-ward, you know, that one with the Man United pyjamas. Doctor Smith has just told him that he's only got two weeks left to live'. I told him there was nothing more we could do for him and he had to be told. Dr Jones said 'I know that, but I wanted to tell the bastard'" The incident follows a complaint from a patient in September of last year when Dr Jones told a cancer victim he had some good news and some bad news "The bad news is you're going to die" "and the good news ?" asked the downcast patient "we beat the scum 2-1 !"



Three football fans were driving along when they spied a body in the undergrowth. Stopping their car, the three guys ran over to see what they could do. Unfortunately, they found the nude body of a deceased young woman. Being gentlemen, the first guy dropped his Derby hat over one breast. The second guy, a Leicester City fan, placed his hat over the other breast. The Leeds fan then placed his hat over the woman's very private part. Soon the police arrived. The coroner started checking over the body. He picked up the Derby hat and quickly placed it back. He then picked up the City hat and returned it. Then he picked up the Leeds fans hat, put it down, then picked it up again inspecting the hat more closely, and then put it down. Then he picked it up a third time. By this time, the Leeds fan was a bit irritated and he asked, "Why do you keep picking up that hat? Are you some kind of pervert or something?". The coroner responded with a wry smile, "Son, I can't figure this one out. Usually when I come across one of these Leeds hats, there's an arsehole under it."



Leeds chairmen Peter Ridsdale is walking down the street when he sees an old women struggling with her shopping: Ridsdale: Can you manage love? Old lady: F*ck off - I don't want the job either!



Sir Walker and Peter Ridsdale are standing on a balcony. They are surrounded by Leicester City and Leeds fans. Ridsdale says to Walker "I bet I can make these Leeds fans go wild". Walker tells him to go on so he lifts his hands up and waves to the crowd. As expected the leeds fans go wild and start chanting. Walker looks at him and says "That's fantastic but I bet I can make the City fans go even more wild. Ridsdale laughs and tells him to have a go. Walker turns round and headbutts Ridsdale and then shouts "F*ck off you can't have O'Neill". The City fans go wild!


Elland Road Boss Peter Risdale has sacked David Leary and employed a new Chinese manager.
His name: Win One Soon

[JohnnyPink]

lolol. Quality.

[RetroAndy]

Fucking Fantatsic That Fella

[RetroAndy]

Originally Posted by ZENZEN

Quality mate!! PMSL!!!




Three football fans were driving along when they spied a body in the undergrowth. Stopping their car, the three guys ran over to see what they could do. Unfortunately, they found the nude body of a deceased young woman. Being gentlemen, the first guy dropped his Derby hat over one breast. The second guy, a Leicester City fan, placed his hat over the other breast. The Leeds fan then placed his hat over the woman's very private part. Soon the police arrived. The coroner started checking over the body. He picked up the Derby hat and quickly placed it back. He then picked up the City hat and returned it. Then he picked up the Leeds fans hat, put it down, then picked it up again inspecting the hat more closely, and then put it down. Then he picked it up a third time. By this time, the Leeds fan was a bit irritated and he asked, "Why do you keep picking up that hat? Are you some kind of pervert or something?". The coroner responded with a wry smile, "Son, I can't figure this one out. Usually when I come across one of these Leeds hats, there's an arsehole under it."



Leeds chairmen Peter Ridsdale is walking down the street when he sees an old women struggling with her shopping: Ridsdale: Can you manage love? Old lady: F*ck off - I don't want the job either!



Sir Walker and Peter Ridsdale are standing on a balcony. They are surrounded by Leicester City and Leeds fans. Ridsdale says to Walker "I bet I can make these Leeds fans go wild". Walker tells him to go on so he lifts his hands up and waves to the crowd. As expected the leeds fans go wild and start chanting. Walker looks at him and says "That's fantastic but I bet I can make the City fans go even more wild. Ridsdale laughs and tells him to have a go. Walker turns round and headbutts Ridsdale and then shouts "F*ck off you can't have O'Neill". The City fans go wild!


Elland Road Boss Peter Risdale has sacked David Leary and employed a new Chinese manager.
His name: Win One Soon

Well at least i can still laugh

Ya bastards

[butty]

lol this is possible the best post i have ever seen


im gonna sticky it at the top for a bit

[RetroAndy]

Originally Posted by butty

lol this is possible the best post i have ever seen


im gonna sticky it at the top for a bit

Ohh come one fella dont be so damm cruel ya tw*t

Andy

[ads]

LOL Quality!!!

[Super Freak]

PMSL Leeds in worse shape than Everton

[Danny]

what a bollox thread this is

still funny thou

[Mad Manc]

Originally Posted by Vision

Is this the real life-
Is this just fantasy-
Leeds in a landslide-
No escape from reality-
Batter your wife,
shag sheep and cry and weeeeep
you're just a poor club, you've got no sympathy
Because you're easy come, easy go,
flying high, now you're low
Leeds are going under, doesn't really matter to me,
To me

Ridsdale, you've killed the club,
Put a goldfish on your desk,
spent too much, but now he's dead,
Ridsdale, life had just begun,
But now you've gone and thrown it all away-
Leeds Scum, ooooooh,
makes me laugh to see you cry
If your team has gone bust this time tomorrow-
Carry on, carry on, cos nothing really matters-

Too late, their time has come,
Sends shivers down my spine-
can't stop laughing all the time,
Goodbye Leeds United-you've got to go-
Gotta leave the premier league and face the truth-
Leeds Scum ooo
I want to see you cry,
I bet that little lad on tv wishes he'd never been born at all-

I see a little shadow of a team,
YSBYSBYSBYSBYSBYSB Songs, YSBYSBYSBYSBYSBYSB Songs, but your club are going under-
Smithy to United-very very frightening me-
Peter Ridsdale, Peter Ridsadale
Peter Ridsdale, Peter Ridsadale
Peter Ridsdale, magnifico-oh oh oh oh oh

you're just a poor club and nobody loves you-
your grandad is your father, keep it in the family
spending your cash on some monstrosity-
Easy come easy go, will you let me go-
Seth Johnson! no-,we will not let you go-let him go-
Seth Johnson! we will not let you go-let him go
Seth Johnson! we will not let you go-let me go
Will not let you go-let me go
Will not let you go let me go
No,no,no,no,no,no,no-
Thanks for Eric, Thanks For Eric, Thanks for Eric, He's a god-
Ferdinand a red devil for £30 mil, £30 mil, £30 Mil

So you think its funny to sing songs when people die-
So you think we'll all miss you because you cried-
Oh leeds scum-you make me @#%$ my sides leeds scum-
Just going down-just going right outta here-

Leeds are going under
Anyone can see,
Leeds are going under, and I think it's really Funneeee

lmfaoooo good lad i bet the leeds scum are rubbing there velcro gloves with erm...... wool?????

[Phil]

I'd watch it mate, there's a lot of 'Leeds Scum' on here!!....