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#1
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| Lmao >>>>>One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Jack says >>>>>to Mike behind him, >>>>>My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I better see a >>>>>doctor. >>>>>Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money, >>>>>Mike replies. >>>>>There's adiagnostic computer down at Walmart. Just >>>>>give it a urine sample >>>>>and the computer'll tell you what's wrong and what >>>>>to do about it. It takes >>>>>ten seconds and costs ten dollars...a hell of a lot >>>>>cheaper than a doctor.. >>>>> >>>>>So Jack deposits a urine sample in a small jar and >>>>>takes it to Walmart. >>>>>He deposits ten dollars, and the computer lights up >>>>>and asks for the urine >>>>>sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits. >>>>>Ten seconds later, >>>>>the computer ejects a printout: You have tennis >>>>>elbow. Soak your arm in >>>>>warmwater and avoid heavy activity. It will improve >>>>>in two weeks. >>>>> >>>>>That evening while thinking how amazing this new >>>>>technology was, Jack >>>>>began wondering if the computer could be fooled. He >>>>>mixed some tap water, >>>>>a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his >>>>>wife and daughter, and >>>>>masturbated into the mixture for good measure. Jack >>>>>hurries back to >>>>>Walmart, eager to check the results. He deposits ten >>>>>dollars, pours in his >>>>>concoction, and awaits the results. The computer >>>>>prints the following: >>>>> >>>>>1.** Your tap water is too hard. Get a water >>>>>softener. >>>>>2.** Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with >>>>>anti-fungal shampoo. >>>>>3.** Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into >>>>>rehab >>>>>4.** Your wife is pregnant...twin girls. They aren't >>>>>yours. Get a lawyer. >>>>>5.** If you don't stop playing with yourself, your >>>>>elbow will never get better. |
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#2
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| Quote:
lol thats good that woody lad
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