liverpool earthquake

[woody]

an oldie but re vamped for the scouse lot
major earthquake measuring 1.8 on the Richter scale hit Liverpool in the
> early hours of Friday 29/08/03 .
>
> Casualties were seen wandering aimlessly saying "bang out of order" ,"
> mental" and " That did my head in " . The earthquake decimated the area
> causing in exess of £11.55 worth of damage.
>
> Several priceless collections of mementos from Ibiza and Corfu were
> damaged beyond repair . Three preserved areas of historic burnt out cars
> were disturbed . Many locals were woken well before thier dole cheques
> arrived.
>
> The Echo reported that thousands of residents were confused and
> bewildered.
>
> They are still trying to come to terms with the fact that the damage and
> destruction was caused by something else instead of them.
>
> One resident - Tracey sharon Smith, a 15 year old mother of four , said "
> It
> was such a shock . Little Chardonnay-Leigh came running though the
> cardboard
> door into my bedroom crying .
>
> My youngest two, Tyler-Brooklyn and Kai-Keanu,
> slept through it all!" "My hands were shaking so much I could hardly shoot
> up when I was watching Trisha".
>
> Another local resident, known as "Mally",
> said that the earthquake could not stop him going to work, after all, the
> burglaries and graffiti would not do themselves.
>
> The British Red Cross has so far managed to ship 4,000 crates of Sunny
> Delight to the area to help with the crisis.
>
> Rescue wotkers were still searching through the rubble and have found
> large
> quantities of personal belongings, which include benefit books, jewellery
> from Elizabeth Dukes, Bone China from Poundstrecher and a number of Argos
> catalogues.
>
> However, they were unable to save any funiture from Crazy Georges. How can
> you help?
>
> This appeal hopes to raise money for food and clothing parcels for those
> unfortunate enough to be caught up in the disater.
>
> Clothing is most sought after. Most needed are Kappa, white socks to tuck
> the tracksuit bottoms in to, Burberry caps. Wooly "Benny" hats and Reebok
> trainers. Primark clothing is most welcome.
>
> Food parcels are also needed. They should include McCain's Micro-chips,
> Aldi
> beans, Monster Munch crisps, Nuttella chocolate spread and Iceland pizza.
> Alcohol is also in short supply mainly Lambrini, White Lightning Cider and
> Carsberg Special Brew.
>
> Cash donations are also needed:- 22p buys a Bic Biro
> for signing on purposes £1.50 buys cheese and chips £26 buys 200 Regal
> from
> "Tommo" who has just got back from Kavos.

[Saysay]

LOL!!!