oh dear old skool anthemz big brother

[sirius]

Originally Posted by WAFC

Day 2
Sirius is refusing to socialise with any of the other housemates, he is instead concentrating all his energies on cinstructing a scaled down model of the german reichstag using matchsticks and toothpaste. miss tickle says she can help out with the matchsticks

Day 3
miss tickle and the slightly happier sirius are furiously debating something called politics. no one in the room has a clue what they are going on about.sirius gets very animated in his attempts to point out how important this is to all there lives. when evidence is provided to the contrary by ab45 a furious sirius storms off kicking his model of the reichstag over as he goes.

day 4
miss tickle confides in valentina that she is attracted to sirius. she says it is his combat 18 tee shirt, cherry red dock martins and burlney suicide squad tattoos that do it for her. valentina states that she to is attracted to sirius but would not make the first move on him so as not not upset miss tickle, that is unless sirius made the first move on her or spoke to her or looked at her.

day 6
Miss Tickle is upset as Sirius has rejected her advances. Valentina offers to sleep with her to make her feel better.

day 7

Sirius still has not left his room not even for a change of underwear. Miss Tickle is still inconsolable after Sirius's knockback

WAFC - Finally, something worthy of me laughing at rather uncontrolably! lol.

Im afraid theres a few errors though, like the model, I actually ran out of matches before I could build the 6th column and decorative embelishments around the tower parts, the cherry red doc's are infact distinctly burgundy with very dark black laces, and as for the romantic advances, I should be so bloody lucky! lol.

Suprisingly, I cant wait for tomorrows installment!


Sirius.

[STEADMANSCOTT]

pmsl av just seen this thread quality,

mid teens??? am now a man lol, 20 me

as for the noises we all know it aint the chair ain that rite ang jokin hun

[mad matty]

this is truely superb!!!!

[misstickle]

lol i think i might do a walk out, my heart cant handle the constant rejection and continuos leftist bashing from Sirius!



Must admit though WAFC, this is one quality thread

Day 8, roll on...............

[cam]

Wheres WAFC the tosser I need another dose of this

[misstickle]

Originally Posted by cam

Wheres WAFC the tosser I need another dose of this

i know!!! maybe we should start a spin off lol

The osa big brother rejects lol

[XValentinadobeX]

im partial to a bit of masterbation and yes im having an audio affair with big brother himself, and tickle the offer is still there forget sirius infact sod all the men women are so much better

[XValentinadobeX]

do u think we'd still get that £100,000? or is it a man on woman kinda rule lets start a feminist riot

[misstickle]

Originally Posted by XValentinadobeX

do u think we'd still get that £100,000? or is it a man on woman kinda rule lets start a feminist riot

lol nice one, I'm up fo a riot! we should get more anyway!! Girl on girl! Far more entertaining

I think I'll be following you into the diary room from now on Val Sirius, you've missed out there mate lol

[sirius]

Originally Posted by misstickle

Sirius, you've missed out there mate lol

I know. .


Its about time they put a camera in that diary room though lol.


Sirius.

[WAFC]

day 7
day 7(long one today)

Big Brother has decreed that the housemates are to take part in a fancy dress/pop idol extravaganza in which the housemates must dress up like there chosen idols and perform a song in order to win more provisions. Miss Tickle quickly states that she would like to act as MC and judge the competition while Sirius and Valentina and still refusing to leave their respective rooms.
que Miss tickle " can i introduce Cam,Shooms and Akinwale."

Akinwale leads out the group, he is dressed in a rather fetching sailor suit while a clearly drunk Cam and Shooms follow, Shooms is decked in Summer Construction Workers attire with handlebar moustache and Cam is wearing an all in one gimp suit.Both of them are carrying bottles of vinegar which is now their only form of alcahol. An enthusiastic yet serious akinwale launches into a rather splendid verison of that all time 1970's disco classic The Village People - YMCA, Johnny pink and superfreak clap along in the front row while steadman states they play this at my school disco. Akinwale is rather disgusted at cam and shooms performance as they appear not to be taking this to seriously. To prove his point he bench presses shooms 4 times above his head while telling cam "your mother wouldn't like what i'd do to you." A clearly irate Akinwale stands in the corner to control his anger.

Steadman is next up. He is dressed in his "hanging round swinton precinct gear" shellsuit,rockports,henri lloyd socks,big adidas trainers and bling. He launches into that "all time rave classic" (sic) "Pretty Green Eyes", It has to be said steadman does a decent job of the song and after he has finished he dedicates it to all the Swinton Valley Bad Boys in their green and orange Saxo VTR turbos out there there.

AB45 is supposed to be next up singing that all time classic Clive Dunn - Grandad, however before he has a chance the lights dim,candles start to flicker and a spotlight trains in on the makeshift stage, Sirius's door swings open and out he stomps. Sirius is resplendent in full Punk Rock outfit,black mohicean,pin through nose,leather jacket with A for Anarchy on the back and tight drainpipe jeans, With gibson les paul slung over his shoulder sirius takes the stage strums his guitar does a 5 foot scissor kick into the air and launches into The Clash - White Riot. There is a chorus of boos and catcalls from Superfreak,Johnnypink and Miss Tickle. While Akinwale is seething with fury in the corner, a clearly high on adrenaline sirius is enjoying the spotlight as he duckwalks past the catcallers while flicking them the vees and giving them the time honoured wanker sign. Tickle can take no more and using one of cams discarded toe nails which shooms has now taken to eating she manages to cut the strings on sirius's guitar to stop his right wing rant. A red faced and panting Valentina emerges from the video room to see what the comotion is about. Akinwale is storming round the room in a fury, Valentina puts her arm round a clearly distressed akinwale and offers to sleep with him.
"WHAT?" shouts akinwale
valentina repeats her question.
this is the final straw for akinwale today, two idiots have made him look foolish while he was singing his favourite song, he's had to put up with sirius and his white power rants and now,worse than anything before, he has been proposationed by a woman, A WOMAN. "AAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGJHHHHHHHHH" screams akinwale. he viciously launches into a verbal assault on a clearly bemused Valentina. "Well what do you wanr then?" asks Valentina. Akinwale is clearly not totally in control of himself at this moment "This is what I want you thick cow" replies the purple one. He grabs a kicking and screaming steadman forces him face first into the setee. Rips of steadmans reebok shellsuir bottoms and y fronts and proceeds to commence action. Shooms and Cam are now donning texas farm hand uniforms, playing banjos while dancing round the soirez and playing the theme tune to 70's cult film deliverance while shouting "squeal boy, squeal like a pig", Grad is uncorned as this type of thing always goes on in Leigh, Miss Tickle is all for gay rights,Sirius is back in his room while SuperFreak,Johnny Pink and Valentina are all masturbating furiously over the free show that is taking place. AB45 looks on at the mayhem before him and mutters under breath "young unz" After the ackying. Steadman proudly marches up to Grad and states "Guess what Grad I've lost my virginity and got a new tattoo in the same day."

Eviction day tomorrow.

[misstickle]

pmsl thats the funniest thing i've read, ever............

[Shooms]

LMAO

WAFC you truly have an incisive, caustic satirist's wit.....

Everyone else calls you a cnut like, but I know talent when I see it

[AB45]

Can i just add that i wasnt that shocked by the bummings. As a matter of fact back in the old days we used have it done properly during our time in national service. Call that a bumming .. you dont know your born yet. After a proper reaming in my day you couldnt walk for a month im tellin you.

Class WAFC

[cam]

purely surperb mate