View Full Version : Bad day at the office dear????

27th February 2002, 06:10 PM
light amusement .. yes it is a bit much to read but it's amuse'n
> >Phil is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in
> >Louisiana. He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling
> >rigs. Below is an e-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent it to
> >Laughline' radio show, who were sponsoring a "worst job experience"
> >contest. Needless to say, she won.
> >
> >This is the email
> >Hi Sue, Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother.
> >Last week I had bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling
> >down lately at work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with
> >you to make you realize it's not so bad after all. Before I can
> >tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a few
> >technicalities of my job. As you know, my office lies at the
> >bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It's a wetsuit.
> >This time of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep
> >warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial water heater.
> >This $20,000 piece of shit sucks the water out of the sea. It
> >heats it to a delightful temperature. It then pumps it down to
> >the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose.
> >Now this sounds like a damn good plan, and I've used it several
> >times with no complaints. What I do, when I get to the bottom and
> >start working, is take the hose and stuff it down the back of my
> >wetsuit. This floods my whole suit with warm water. It's like
> >working in a Jacuzzi.
> >Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my bum started
> >to itch. So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things
> >worse. Within a few seconds my arse started to burn. I pulled the
> >hose out from my back, but the damage was done. In agony I
> >realized what had happened. The hot water machine had sucked up a
> >jellyfish and pumped it into my suit.
> >Now since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish
> >couldn't stick to it. However, the crack of my bum was not as
> >fortunate. When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was
> >actually grinding the jellyfish into my arse. I informed the dive
> >supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator. His instructions
> >were unclear due to the fact that he along with 5 other divers
> >were all laughing hysterically.
> >Needless to say I aborted the dive. I was instructed to make 3
> >agonizing in-water decompression stops totalling 35 minutes
> >before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry
> >decompression. When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing
> >nothing but my brass helmet. As I climbed out of the water, the
> >medic, with tears of laughter running down his face, handed me a
> >tube of cream and told me to rub it on my bum as soon as I get in
> >the chamber. The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't sh*t for
> >2 days because my arsehole was swollen shut. So, next time you're
> >having a bad day at work, think about how much worse it would be
> >if you had a jellyfish shoved up your arse......

The Joker
27th February 2002, 06:27 PM
pmsl Pix m8, I'll remember that next time I'm havin a bad day!!

:D :D :D :D :D :D