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The Joker
24th January 2002, 08:53 PM
Always lick after meals!

Learn the difference between idleness and repose - one wastes time the other luxuriates in it.

The great lies of Life are:

1. The cheque is in the post.

2. All I want is one kiss.

2. It'll be alright, just get in the travelling basket.

Long naps never go out of fashion.

Just say no to catnip!

Let sleeping dogs lie - literally!

Get your booster shots every year.

Get to know every view from every window in your home.

Begin each day with a long hard stretch.

Treat yourself to a nap in the sock drawer once in a while.

Own nothing and be owned by no one.

Never be discouraged by the words No, Stop That or Bad Cat.

Never purr half-heartedly.

Don't worry about little things.

Don't worry about big things.

See how long that toilet paper around the roll really is.

Miaow and the world Miaows with you, hiss and you hiss alone.

Keep everybody's secrets.

Make friends with the milkman.

Play and sleep in cardboard boxes.

Help with making the bed.

Help with making dinner.

Regard all neatly stacked piles of paper as provocation.

Don't cry over spilt milk - lap it up instead.

Make the world your scratching post.

Never sleep alone!

and finally...

Become someone's friend for life.