[Phil]

Feeling very lonely because her husband had died the year before, a Jewish lady decides to buy a pet to keep her company.

So, she goes to her local pet shop and explains her situation to the shop manager. "I've got just the thing for you," he says. "This is Bella, a female parrot - she will chat sweetly to you all day." The Jewish lady is delighted and buys the bird. When she gets the parrot home, she says, "Come on Bella, say something."
Bella says "My name is Bella. I like to fuck and I want some sex!" The old lady is so shocked she nearly passes out. She leaves it for an hour or so and approaches the parrot once more. But no luck: "My name is Bella and I want to fuck!" The lady decides enough is enough and plans to return the parrot immediately. However, just as she's about to leave, the local rabbi comes round.

She explains her bad luck with the parrot. "Don't worry," says the rabbi, "I've got three parrots at home and I've taught them so well that all they do is pray all day. Let me take Bella to them and they will make her a good parrot." The widow agrees and so the rabbi leaves with Bella.

He gets home and tells his parrots, "This is Bella, she is bad, you must teach her to be good." Bella shouts, "My name is Bella, I like to fuck and I want sex now." The rabbi's parrots look at each other and one shouts, "I told you if we prayed long enough…"